When an aging parent becomes seriously ill, families often find themselves making difficult decisions in the middle of an already emotional crisis. One of the most important things families can do is prepare before the crisis happens.
Taking the time to establish a Medical Power of Attorney or healthcare surrogate, a Durable Power of Attorney when appropriate, and clear advance directives can make an enormous difference when a parent is no longer able to speak for themselves.
It is also important to have an honest conversation about code status, including whether your parent would want CPR and other resuscitative measures if their heart or breathing stopped. Depending on the individual’s wishes and medical circumstances, this may include discussing DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) and DNI (Do Not Intubate) orders with their healthcare provider.
These conversations can be uncomfortable—but waiting until someone is critically ill is often much harder.
Know Who Speaks for Your Parent
In many families, an aging parent has one person they trust to step in and make healthcare decisions if they become incapacitated. Make sure everyone knows who that person is.
Just as importantly, make sure the documentation is completed, current, and easy to find.
Keep copies where appropriate and make sure key family members know where the documents are located. Providing copies to the primary care provider and having the information available when entering the hospital can prevent unnecessary confusion.
When a patient arrives at the hospital, the care team needs to know:
Who is the decision-maker?
Where is the documentation?
What are the patient’s wishes?
When those answers are readily available, communication between the family, physicians, nurses, case management, and other members of the healthcare team becomes much more straightforward.
Preparation Protects the Patient
A patient lying in a hospital bed should not have to bear the burden of sorting out these details while they are sick. And families should not have to guess what their loved one would have wanted.
Being proactive is not about expecting the worst. It is about respecting a person’s wishes and protecting their voice when they may no longer be able to speak for themselves.
For families working with a clinical nurse advocate, having these documents in place is equally important. With the proper authorization, an advocate can communicate with the healthcare team, help the family understand what is happening, and remain focused on the patient’s needs.
At Nightingale Patient Advocates, we believe preparation, communication, and attention to detail can make an overwhelming healthcare experience more manageable.
Have the conversation. Complete the paperwork. Know where it is. And make sure the right people know who to call.
Because when a healthcare crisis occurs, it is much easier to focus on the patient when the important decisions have already been thoughtfully addressed.
